- When his son, Christopher Mannino, 44, was born, was a high school theater teacher in 2016.
- He had a brief paternity break and took panic attacks because he rarely saw his son.
- The costs of daily care were also expensive, so he decided to become a father of staying home in the country.
This essay as strong is based on a conversation with Christopher Mannino, author of the next book “Taking it: a revolutionary way to connect with children through play“Hasten edited for length and clarity.
After my son was born, I began to do panic attacks at work.
I have been a high school theater teacher in Maryland – my dream work. I learned six classes of drama and ran a massive theater program, grateful I could only focus on the topic I loved instead of teaching it only as an extracurricular after school.
It was also difficult. I have only three days of paternity rest; I was told, quite clearly, that if I were to get more, I could go to teach another topic when I returned. Knowing this, my wife and I deliberately planned her pregnancy so that she was born during the summer, when I would have more time at home.
Things deteriorated as soon as the school year began. I was often the first person I entered and the last I left. I also often worked on weekends, directing the rehearsals of show or improvised events.
During that time, I often felt stressed and guilty that I was not becoming a father I always wanted to be. I would choose my son from daily care and I would feel like I never saw him.
Christopher Mannino with his son. Christopher Mannino
So when our son was 6 months old, I left my job and became a father staying home for him and, later, his sister. After six years of staying home, I am grateful for our time together.
We were not happy with our daily care
As it is for many American parents, our child care was very expensive. We put our son in daily care when he was 2 months old, just when my wife’s maternity leave was over.
After taxes, my mandatory union fee, lowering health care and pension savings, I have spent most of every payment on daily care.
We also had concerns about the quality of care our son received. We started looking at other baby care options, including home services, but we could not allow them. Others had no availability.
At one point in our research, we wondered why we were doing this. My wife did much more than I did in fewer hours. After talking it, I left my job and remained home full time.
It was scary to suddenly move on to a new income, but then we remembered that we didn’t have to pay for the care of the children. Financially, everything is well equated.
Leaving my comfort zone
Apart from our initial fear of being with a income, which is less common these days, I have never met a father of staying home before. I knew it was unusual and being called “Mr. Mom” by members of the family solidarized how strange it seemed to others.
I also had to adapt from full -time work. My high -power work, which included work with over 300 students a year, was reduced to spending all my hours with a child. At first it was very annoying.
It took me about a year to feel safe. At first, I would take my son at the time of the story and the playgrounds, where I would be the only father among the 15 mothers. I would feel uncomfortable to approach women I would never meet and seek to create games.
Things began to change when I realized that I could recreate the best parts of my work at home. I read a book called “The last father of staying at home” and learned that the fraud was leaving my comfort zone and meeting as many people as possible. Over time, I felt safer talking to new parents.
Once a week, I took my son to an adventure, branched away from playgrounds and libraries. We went to the museum, to the zoo, on the beach. When it hit the pandemia, we built a rocket ship in the living room. Our rocket was made possible by the song, and we came up with what ranks all the planets in order. We still sing it to this day.
Staying home for 2 children
Our daughter was born in 2019 when our son was 3 years old.
Christopher Mannino with his daughter. Christopher Mannino
At the time he entered preschool, I was more experienced as a father of staying home. We would be transferred to Delaware, and I remember taking my daughter to Valley Forge, a historic park with the fortress of the revolutionary war on screen. I still remember when she put her hands on her head and said, “Dad, I’m done. No more George Washingblub.”
Another time, we were food shopping and I could say she was about to have a tantrum. We played a game where she “froze” me in the fridge row. Some parents observed us, surprising with me staying in funny poses while she laughed.
After my daughter started the preschool in 2023, I became a part -time replacement teacher to have more flexibility if the child became ill or had a day off. Since then I have changed my careers, becoming a full -time author and working on a book about my experiences as a father of staying at home.
I still lovingly look back in my dream work as a theater teacher. I’m proud of the work I did, and I know some of my former students now have careers in Hollywood and New York.
I also know I would have lost so much if I had stuck to see only my kids on weekends. Dreamsndrrarat change, and this ended by being the best.